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A Flying Spaghetti Monster apparition was spotted in jet trails. May you be touched by his noodly appendage. Believe.

Video: The Colbert Report on what would happen if everyone was forced to vote.

Time will reveal that the recent plane terror bombing plot was fake, coordinated by the United States and U.K. governments and Murdoch's News Corp. The suspects are improbable, the evidence is extremely thin, and the whole plan wouldn't have worked anyway. "None of the alleged terrorists had made a bomb. None had bought a plane ticket. Many did not even have passports, which given the efficiency of the UK Passport Agency would mean they couldn't be a plane bomber for quite some time." It seems very tinfoil hat, but I have the Gorilla Glue and clippers out. No one giving us any raw information about the event has a track record of regularly telling the truth. The lower governmental agencies are merely responding to the information they're given and the orders from above. They don't (can't) know any better, and we're not supposed to either. It all sounds very familiar. In short, trust no one, but fuck being afraid. Happy Thursday. [via reddit]

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